No. Islam forbids abuse in marriage. The Prophet ﷺ never struck any woman or servant, and he said, 'The best of you are the best to their wives.' The verse people quote (4:34) is widely misread.
The fuller answer
Verse 4:34 lists steps for a husband when his wife is disloyal: advise, then separate in bed and, as a last step, 'daraba'. Scholars across history said it does not allow harm. The Prophet ﷺ disapproved of striking and said 'those who do so are not the best of you'. Those who allow it at all, such as some classical jurists, said it must be symbolic, such as with a tooth-stick, must not hurt or leave a mark, and must never be on the face. Many modern scholars read 'daraba' as meaning to separate or to leave.
What is certain is that Muslims are commanded to live with their wives in kindness, and that causing physical or psychological harm is forbidden. Domestic violence is a crime that no Muslim can justify by faith, and victims are encouraged to seek help and protection.
Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband's] absence what Allah would have them guard. But those [wives] from whom you fear arrogance - [first] advise them; [then if they persist], forsake them in bed; and [finally], strike them. But if they obey you [once more], seek no means against them. Indeed, Allah is ever Exalted and Grand.
O you who have believed, it is not lawful for you to inherit women by compulsion. And do not make difficulties for them in order to take [back] part of what you gave them unless they commit a clear immorality. And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.
And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.
Sources
The hadith and reports behind this answer. Open a number to read it on sunnah.com.
This answer follows the mainstream Sunni understanding and is general learning, not a fatwa. Where Muslims differ, the answer says so. Have a question of your own? Write to us.
