Allah commands: live with them in kindness (4:19), and says that women have rights similar to those against them in what is right (2:228). The Prophet ﷺ said: the best of you is the best to his wives, and I am the best of you to my wives. He also advised to treat women well.
1The husband's duties
Spending on his wife and family according to his means (food, clothing, housing).
Kind and fair treatment, and equal treatment between wives if there is more than one.
Not harming her, and not humiliating or striking her in any way that harms.
Protecting her honour and teaching her what she needs from religion.
2The wife's duties
Fulfilling the husband's rights in marriage, in what is right.
Safeguarding his home, his wealth and her own honour.
Cooperating on the household and raising the children, according to the custom the two agree on.
3Leadership and consultation
Allah says that men are the protectors and maintainers of women because of what they spend (4:34). This leadership is a responsibility, not an excuse for harshness.
The Prophet ﷺ advised to take care of women, saying that they were created from a rib. This meant to be gentle and patient with them.
Where the schools differ
The four Sunni schools agree on the main ruling above and differ in these points. No school is preferred here.
Housework. the schools differ about whether it is an obligation on the wife or a matter of custom and kindness. Both are encouraged to help each other, as the Prophet ﷺ did in his home.
Ó fiéis, não vos é permitido herdar as mulheres, contra a vontade delas, nem as atormentar, com os fim de vosapoderardes de uma parte daquilo que as tenhais dotado, a menos que elas tenham cometido comprovada obscenidade. Eharmonizai-vos entre elas, pois se as menosprezardes, podereis estar depreciando seres que Deus dotou de muitas virtudes.
As divorciadas aguardarão três menstruação e, se crêem em Deus e no Dia do Juízo Final, não deverão ocultar o queDeus criou em suas entranhas. E seus esposos têm mais direito de as readmitir, se desejarem a reconciliação, porque elastem direitos equivalentes aos seus deveres, embora os homens tenham um grau sobre elas, porquanto Deus é Poderoso, Prudentíssimo.
Os homens são os protetores das mulheres, porque Deus dotou uns com mais (força) do que as outras, e pelo o seusustento do seu pecúlio. As boas esposas são as devotas, que guardam, na ausência (do marido), o segredo que Deusordenou que fosse guardado. Quanto àquelas, de quem suspeitais deslealdade, admoestai-as (na primeira vez), abandonai osseus leitos (na segunda vez) e castigai-as (na terceira vez); porém, se vos obedecerem, não procureis meios contra elas. Sabei que Deus é Excelso, Magnânimo.
From the Sunnah
Jami' at-Tirmidhi 3895
The point of the hadith: The best of you is the best to his wives, and I am the best of you to my wives.
Graded by
Ahmad Muhammad Shakir: Sahih
Al-Albani: Sahih
Bashar Awad Maarouf: Hasan Sahih
Zubair Ali Zai: Hasan
Read the Arabic text
حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ يَحْيَى، قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ يُوسُفَ، قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا سُفْيَانُ، عَنْ هِشَامِ بْنِ عُرْوَةَ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، عَنْ عَائِشَةَ، قَالَتْ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم " خَيْرُكُمْ خَيْرُكُمْ لأَهْلِهِ وَأَنَا خَيْرُكُمْ لأَهْلِي وَإِذَا مَاتَ صَاحِبُكُمْ فَدَعُوهُ " . قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ غَرِيبٌ صَحِيحٌ مِنْ حَدِيثِ الثَّوْرِيِّ مَا أَقَلَّ مَنْ رَوَاهُ عَنِ الثَّوْرِيِّ . وَرُوِيَ هَذَا عَنْ هِشَامِ بْنِ عُرْوَةَ عَنْ أَبِيهِ عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم مُرْسَلٌ .
This is general information, not a fatwa. For your own situation, ask a qualified scholar.
Fiqh questions
The rights of husband and wife
Allah commands: live with them in kindness (4:19), and says that women have rights similar to those against them in what is right (2:228). The Prophet ﷺ said: the best of you is the best to his wives, and I am the best of you to my wives. He also advised to treat women well.
Is this a fatwa?
No. It is a summary of well-known rulings with their evidence. For your own case, ask a qualified scholar.
What if my school differs from this answer?
Follow the view of the school you follow and the scholar who teaches you. The page lists the differences of the four schools.