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Haram Family & relations

Is disobeying parents haram?

Short answer

Yes. Allah commands kindness to parents and forbids even saying “uff” to them (17:23). The Prophet ﷺ listed disobedience to parents among the greatest sins.

Evidence

Quran

۞ وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوٓا۟ إِلَّآ إِيَّاهُ وَبِٱلْوَٰلِدَيْنِ إِحْسَٰنًا ۚ إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ ٱلْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَآ أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُل لَّهُمَآ أُفٍّۢ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوْلًۭا كَرِيمًۭا ﴿٢٣﴾

Na Mola wako Mlezi ameamrisha kuwa msimuabudu yeyote ila Yeye tu, na wazazi wawili muwatendee wema. Mmoja wao akifikia uzee, naye yuko kwako, au wote wawili, basi usimwambie hata: Ah! Wala usiwakemee. Na sema nao kwa msemo wa hishima.

وَوَصَّيْنَا ٱلْإِنسَٰنَ بِوَٰلِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُۥ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍۢ وَفِصَٰلُهُۥ فِى عَامَيْنِ أَنِ ٱشْكُرْ لِى وَلِوَٰلِدَيْكَ إِلَىَّ ٱلْمَصِيرُ ﴿١٤﴾

Na tumemuusia mtu kwa wazazi wake wawili. Mama yake ameichukua mimba yake kwa udhaifu juu ya udhaifu, na kumwachisha ziwa baada ya miaka miwili. (Tumemuusia): Nishukuru Mimi na wazazi wako. Ni kwangu Mimi ndiyo marudio.

Hadith

Sahih al-Bukhari 5976

Narrated Abu Bakra:Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said thrice, "Shall I not inform you of the biggest of the great sins?" We said, "Yes, O Allah's Messenger (ﷺ)" He said, "To join partners in worship with Allah: to be undutiful to one's parents." The Prophet (ﷺ) sat up after he had been reclining and added, "And I warn you against giving forged statement and a false witness; I warn you against giving a forged statement and a false witness." The Prophet kept on saying that warning till we thought that he would not stop

Arabic text (with chain of narrators)

حَدَّثَنِي إِسْحَاقُ، حَدَّثَنَا خَالِدٌ الْوَاسِطِيُّ، عَنِ الْجُرَيْرِيِّ، عَنْ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ أَبِي بَكْرَةَ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ ـ رضى الله عنه ـ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏"‏ أَلاَ أُنَبِّئُكُمْ بِأَكْبَرِ الْكَبَائِرِ ‏"‏‏.‏ قُلْنَا بَلَى يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ‏.‏ قَالَ ‏"‏ الإِشْرَاكُ بِاللَّهِ، وَعُقُوقُ الْوَالِدَيْنِ ‏"‏‏.‏ وَكَانَ مُتَّكِئًا فَجَلَسَ فَقَالَ ‏"‏ أَلاَ وَقَوْلُ الزُّورِ وَشَهَادَةُ الزُّورِ، أَلاَ وَقَوْلُ الزُّورِ وَشَهَادَةُ الزُّورِ ‏"‏‏.‏ فَمَا زَالَ يَقُولُهَا حَتَّى قُلْتُ لاَ يَسْكُتُ‏.‏

Read on sunnah.com

This is general information, not a fatwa. For your own situation, ask a qualified scholar.

Questions about halal and haram

Is disobeying parents haram?

Yes. Allah commands kindness to parents and forbids even saying “uff” to them (17:23). The Prophet ﷺ listed disobedience to parents among the greatest sins.

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